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Katherine Brunkow didn?t meet Pfc. Thomas D. Caughman until after he died.

The pair share an unusual relationship. Brunkow created a portrait of this young soldier, who died last June in Iraq, for an exhibit at Arlington National Cemetery. She gave him an opportunity to be memorialized and remembered. He gave her certainty that 'Love is strong as death.'

Brunkow, a member of Woodside UMC in Silver Spring, was one of 200 artists asked to portray the faces of the 1,328 American soldiers who died in Afghanistan or Iraq between Oct. 10, 2001 and Nov. 11, 2004. (To date, the Washington Post reports 1,674 U.S. fatalities in Iraq.)

Caughman was one of nine portraits Brunkow created. Her servicemen all died between June 7 and June 19, 2004. She received thumbnail photos of them and some brief biographical information that had been published in the Washington Post.

Caughman?s photo shows a 20-year-old man with a boyish grin. He appears to be wearing a tuxedo, perhaps set to graduate from high school or dance at the prom. When she began the portrait she knew he was from Lexington, S.C., and was a member of the Army Reserves in C Company of the 391st Engineer Battalion. He was killed when his vehicle was struck with rocket-propelled grenades and small arms fire in Baghdad.

The others? thumbnails offered similar details and her mind rushed in to create whole lives for them. The oldest of Brunkow?s subjects, for example, was Maj. Paul R. Syverson III, 32, of Lake Zurich, Ill., of the 5th Special Forces Group. He was killed during a mortar attack on his camp in Balad. 'There is something about the specificity of their lives,' she said.

She was asked to participate in the exhibit by Ann Polan, one of her former teachers at the Corcoran College of Art and Design in Washington.

'My interest in the project was based on my opposition to the war, my wish to do something for these families (the portraits will be given to them when the exhibit closes Nov. 11), my hope that the art would stir something new in viewers, and my personal need to do something with the anger and loss I feel about current politics in our country,' Brunkow wrote in an article in Woodside?s newsletter.

The artists who participated in the project were intentionally apolitical in their work. Their assignment was simply 'to honor and respect the fallen, and perhaps in some small way, offer a measure of comfort to the family.'

Each of the six-by-eight inch portraits is remarkably unique. Some artists worked in traditional oil paints, others with wood carvings, etchings on metal, collage and mixed media. Some are more abstract, others more representational. The one thing that unites them is that each invites you to become a witness, to meet the person it portrays eye-to-eye and not feel their absence.

Brunkow?s photos share this bold invitation to bear witness. The backgrounds are red and blue, conjuring the symbolism of the American flag. She created the faces with graphite sticks ? using a broad range of black and white, and shot through with erasures.

The portraits, three of which are featured in Smithsonian magazine, allowed her to use her hands to smear in shading and shadows. 'I wanted to touch their faces,' she said. 'The erasures make them seem like they?ve been through something.'

The exhibit opened March 22 at the Women in Military Service to America Memorial at Arlington Cemetery. Organizers were expecting between 300 and 400 visitors. More than 1,400 people came from all over the United States and from India and Australia.

At the exhibit, Brunkow saw the name Caughman on the nametag of Thomas? aunt. She was introduced to the family and was nervous about how they might react to the portrait.

Thomas?s father walked right toward the wall, looking for his son?s face, and there he was; 'That was his smile,' he said. His mother told their local paper, 'I looked at it, and I could not believe it. He had that smile on his face.' A stranger had given her the gift of capturing her son?s trademark grin, she said.

As a clinical social worker and psychoanalyst, Brunkow said, her work involves being able to find the words to express and understand complex, contradictory emotions. But it has been hard for her to describe all she feels about creating the portraits and meeting Caughman?s family, who sent her a packet of information about him so she could know him even better.

General Richard B. Myers, chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, seemed to share Brunkow?s feelings. At the opening of the Faces of the Fallen exhibit, Myers said, 'Words always fall short when we try to describe our respect, our sympathy and our profound gratitude to those who have sacrificed everything in the service of the nation. I think the lesson here today is that the artists have succeeded where our words have failed.'

For Brunkow, faith and art are impossible to separate, and she takes the general?s thoughts a step further, believing God can speak a word, even when art fails to express the complex and contradictory emotions that surround issues of war and peace.

'The best I can do,' she said, 'is say that despite the terrible things we human beings find to do to each other, we are also able to find amazing ways to be connected.'

Brunkow?s images and the other portraits in the exhibit can be seen at the exhibit?s Web site, www.facesofthefallen.org.