News and Views

Forging A New Path

 “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility regard others as better than yourselves. Let each of you look not to your own interests, but to the interests of others.” -- Philippians 2: 3-4 

Have you ever been listening to a song you’ve heard a thousand times before and it just hits you differently? You can hum the melody from beginning to end and you know the lyrics by heart, but this time it just hits you differently. That happened to me a few days after Christmas. I was walking through the grocery store, singing along with a tune and the song gripped me in a different way. The song was The Living Years by Mike + The Mechanics. I couldn’t get the song out of my head and I didn’t understand why it was speaking to me so poignantly. I finally sat down and listened to it in the quiet of my home without distraction. As I listened to these words, I felt convicted about the coming year: 

So we open up a quarrel
Between the present and the past
We only sacrifice the future
It’s the bitterness that lasts

This song was released when I was attending law school in Bloomington, Indiana, in 1988. It is part of the soundtrack of my life. But as I heard it a few days ago, it spoke to me about our future and what we risk if we aren’t willing to see beyond our tightly held beliefs, beyond our well-crafted opinions. It is the bitterness that lasts. The words themselves are often forgotten. The nuances blow away like leaves in the wind. But the bitterness that was created remains and hardens hearts. It fosters an acrimony that is almost impenetrable. It is at this moment that we no longer care what happens to another, whether they stay or go, whether they prosper or suffer, whether they are included or cast aside. When all else is gone, it’s the bitterness that lasts. Bitterness is a price we cannot afford to pay.

As a church, we have not just embarked upon a new year. We have closed the door on a very painful chapter of our United Methodist lives. Therefore, we have an opportunity to learn the lessons of the past and begin a new future together -- a future that brims with newness and hope and possibility. We are not obliged to repeat our past mistakes, but we must be mindful of them and refuse to repeat those corrosive behaviors. We must learn a new way of living together as the Beloved Community.

The chorus of The Living Years includes the line, “You can listen as well as you hear.” The definition of listening is “to hear something with thoughtful attention.” Listening is an active process that requires an intentional choice. We can hear sounds without actually listening to them. We can claim to be in a conversation without really listening to what is being said. When that happens, we are really engaged in a monologue rather than a conversation or dialogue. We are simply rehearsing our perspective without opening ourselves to what others are sharing, or the reasoning that supports their belief. But this year can be different. We can choose to listen as well as we hear 

We have significant decisions to make in the coming days. How will we design and structure the annual conferences for even more effective disciple-making? How will the General Conference define the trajectory of our denomination, both in theology and structure? How will we collaborate as a jurisdiction to engage in deeper mission and ministry? Will we elect new bishops and how will all of the bishops be deployed? How will we bring revival to our congregations? These are herculean decisions that will affect our future for generations. Generations. This requires discernment beyond our desires and preferences. This requires a selfless surrender to something larger than ourselves. It will require being open to the Spirit, but also being open to one another.

After visiting the Methodist societies in Newcastle, it is reported that John Wesley believed those gathered lacked something extremely important for their future. He discerned they lacked the discipline needed to grow in holiness of heart and life with one another. He advised that along with gathering to pray and receive a word of exhortation, they also had to watch over one another in love. I contend it is impossible to watch over one another in love without the willingness to listen to one another.

Another line in the song reminds us that “we all talk a different language talking in defense.” There is a tendency to guard or defend the past, including our previously held beliefs and the decisions attendant to them. Somehow, we believe that to make a different decision or have a change of mind casts aspersions upon our former selves. Yet, our Wesleyan heritage calls us to continued study, growth, discernment and evolution. We are not prisoners to the past and change does not condemn. We are all going on to perfection.

The song The Living Years is ultimately about living with the regret of not learning how to be in relationship with a loved one when we don’t see eye to eye. How do we transcend and love one another beyond our differences? The irony is that the writers had both recently lost their fathers, and only through those deaths did they realize they had more in common with them than they previously believed. Beloved, there will be differences of opinion as we discuss the many matters before us. We will disagree on various and sundry points. But those disagreements do not have to divide us. We can choose to listen and understand. We can choose to privilege the needs of others beyond our own. We can choose to respect the Imago Dei in all and know that God loves them just as God loves us and find a way to discern together. We can understand that, as followers of Jesus Christ, we have far more in common than we understand. We can choose to listen as well as we hear. May it be so.

Happy New Year! Happy Living Year!

Bishop LaTrelle Miller Easterling
Baltimore-Washington and Peninsula-Delaware Conferences
The United Methodist Church